Okay I thought that I would explain a little bit more about what happened to me when I told you about my infection.Although many doctors arent yet aware of the affects of SI being people have just (came out of the closet) so to speek with it recently,there is a lot the doctors don't understand.Okay to the best of my explanation through my experince and the experinces of many other friends of mine who have self injured in the past when you cut with a razor there is somthing inside the razor urm a sort of poison that is a part of the razor itself,and we cannot ever clean the razors enough to rid all the poison being its not on the outside its made into the razor itself.And the question a lot of people ask me is why if there is poison in these razors why is it that people who lay down carpet with these knives never get the problem that a lot of self injurers are not fourtanate enough to live through.Okay the answer to that is when people (accedently) cut themselvs with razors they don't constantly do it and the body builds a sort of antibiotic to the poison and the infection is never bad as in they might get a little pus and its over in a few days.As in the diffrence with self injurers is that when you cut on a constant bases such as everyday or so mant times a day and so much a week your body may keep itself healthy for a while but in time it breaks down,being if you stay healthy for a long time then it means that you have a great immunity system,being may people go years without the infection then all of a sudden it hits them,well everytime you cut poison goes into your blood stream and eventulay your body breaks down from this and you get sick,I'm not out to scare anyone thats not my intention here,my only intention is to help people and by sharing my experince and that of others I hoped it might help others out there.If you do have this infection (its the same symptions as the flu only you don't throw up instead you "spit up" and when you do your body is trying to get rid of the poison.So PLEASE if you or somone that you know has the problem get them or youself to a hospatial and get antibiotics,although "most" doctors don't understand the effects of SI they do give you antibiotics which helps you fight off the disease.One good drug for fighting it off it penicilin but rembember I am NOT a professional and don't claim to be I highly recommend that you get professional help but it does help to drink as much water as you can.



Being this page is about living with the effects of SI I would like to talk about other problems such as scars.

At first I hated myself for the scars and the way people would stare at me everytime I wore no sleevs and I thought that the only way to avoid this is to wear long sleevs,well the truth is that when you have those scars you will proberly have to live with them beucase they will proberly never fade completly so for me the best way of exceptince was to ((slowly)) wear shorter sleevs and I would draw stuff on my arms and it would cover the scars,well it took about 2 years I'm not saying it happened suddenly but I did finaly get to the point where I wore sleevless shirts,and now I can without a problem,and now I can talk to people about my SI and explain the scars as "I had sereve depression cutting was my vent" and talking to people about this when they ask is good cause it helps you not only to vent and explain but also to help that person understand SI and how its not always in with gangs well this type isent anyway.It helps them to understand that you did it for a releise and although yes there are going to be people who will judge you but those people don't understand and they don't mean to but they can hurt us greatly with thier words.My advise on that is to try and not talk with them about SI until they are ready to listen without judging.

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